Distant Memories - Part Quatro
Distant Memories - Part Quatro

story by Jephael



The Simpsons Earth (Elseworld FOX); Springfield (State + Date <Null>)

Jenny finds herself lying on top of a picnic table in what looks like the playground of a school. She notices the 4Kids TMNT in a heap under a set of monkey bars.

JENNY: "That was one heck of a ride!"
4KIDS MIKEY: "Tell me about it, girl."
4KIDS RAPH: "Oh, where'd that freaking computer virus send us to?!"
4KIDS LEO: "This certainly doesn't look like Central Park, or any spot in New York! Do you suppose our counterparts were able to stop Viral?"
4KIDS DON: "They may not be as skillful fighters as us, but they can handle themselves."
4KIDS RAPH: "Yea, against mutant bananas!"
4KIDS MIKEY: "Raph, you are so stupid. You keep mistaking the Dimension J Turtles for that other set of Turtles we dealt with before!"
4KIDS RAPH: "So what?! They're all the same dipsticks in my book, with those dumb belt initials and cheesy smiles plastered over their faces!"
4KIDS MIKEY: "Oh you're just mad because you wanted to beat up Hun and the Purple Dragons by yourself!"
4KIDS LEO: (Sighs.) "Okay, you two really need to shut up before you draw any attention our way! We have no idea where in time and space we are!"
JENNY: "I wonder if Jeff and the guys went back to the Halls of Lost Legends to look for us."
4KIDS DON: "Why would they go there?"
JENNY: "Before coming to your world, the Turtles of our world got sucked into a dimensional rift and we had no way of finding them, so we had to go see the Prime Turtles to get a fix on their location."
4KIDS RAPH: "Oh right, the source dimension! Man, why can't we ever hang out with those guys?"
4KIDS MIKEY: "Yea, just what we need... five of you!"

4Kids Raphael becomes enraged and tackles 4Kids Michelangelo. That same moment inside the school, young Bart Simpson is minding his business after having stayed behind after class to write "No Way Home was not blatant fan service!" several times on the chalkboard.

PRINCIPAL SKINNER: "Bart, what are you still doing here? Detention is over!"
BART: "I know, but I'm just waiting for Jimbo to find the little surprise I left in his locker."
PRINCIPAL SKINNER: "He got sent home early after coming down with a case of mono."
BART: "Ew! Well, I guess I'll head home then. Mom and Dad are taking us out to Krusty Burger tonight. Smell ya later!"
PRINCIPAL SKINNER: "Likewise, young man."

Bart heads out through the playground just as 4Kids Michelangelo is thrown against a seesaw by 4Kids Raphael.

4KIDS RAPH: "And stay down, ya jerk!" (Notices Bart staring at them.) "Uh oh."
BART: "Aye Carumba!!!"
4KIDS LEO: "Darn it, I knew something like this would happen!"
4KIDS RAPH: "Sorry, Leo, but you know how Mikey gets under my shell!"
4KIDS MIKEY: "Well, you started it."
4KIDS RAPH: "Why I oughta-"
4KIDS LEO: (Grits his teeth in frustration.) "Guys, enough!!!"
JENNY: "Bart Simpson? Huh, I thought this school looked familiar."
BART: "How the hell do you know my name, lady?"
4KIDS DON: "Quite a smart-mouth we got here, huh?"
4KIDS RAPH: "Oh, we don't have time for this!!!"
4KIDS LEO: "It's not like we have much of a choice, Raphael. Until our Dimension J counterparts show up to retrieve us, we're pretty much stuck here."
4KIDS RAPH: "Yea and then what, we end up having to help them on whatever stupid mission they gotta go on to save the multiverse?! Incase you've forgotten, fearless leader, our Master Splinter is back at the farmhouse, growing more and more senile by the day!"
4KIDS MIKEY: "Is that's what's had you so hot and bothered lately?"
4KIDS LEO: "Look, I know it's painful to watch him deteriorate like that, but Master Splinter lived a long and happy life. We owe it to ourselves to honor him by-"
4KIDS DON: "Uh guys, can we uh postpone this conversation for later? Because it looks like some of Bart's playmates are about to discover us."

4Kids Donatello points towards a nerdy blue haired boy bothering a spiky haired girl.

BART: "Oh, it's just my younger sister Lisa getting harassed by my friend Milhouse who has a crush on her. Just go hide behind that tool shack and I'll do what I can to get them to leave."

Bart walks up to Lisa and Milhouse.

MILHOUSE: "Oh hey, Bart. I was just asking Lisa here if she wanted to go with me to see Rainier Wolfcastle's new romantic sci-fi action comedy co-starring Natalie Portman!"
LISA: "For the 45th time, Milhouse, I am not interested in going with you to see McBain 12: Love in the Milky Way!"
BART: "Yea, I'm still majorly disappointed by that stupid spring break one he did... McBain 11: Surf's Up, Atlanta."
MILHOUSE: "Okay then, why don't you pick a movie to go see?"
LISA: "I'm sorry, Milhouse. I've got a lot of homework to do. Bart, tell Mom and Dad that I'll be at the library."

Lisa takes off on her bicycle.

MILHOUSE: "Oh well, atleast I have you to hang out with, Bart!"
BART: "Uh yea. Hey listen, I heard Nelson's on the warpath again and I saw him earlier grumbling something about giving the first nerd he sees an atomic wedgie!"
MILHOUSE: (Gasps in fright.) "B-but I just washed all my underwear!"
BART: "Well then, you'd better scram before he shows up."
MILHOUSE: "What if he decides to beat you up?"
BART: (Sighs.) "Look, I'm sort of in the middle of something and I didn't want to sound like a jerk and blow you off, so I made up that thing about Nelson. He's out with his mom for the weekend. I promise that we'll hang out tomorrow. Deal?"
MILHOUSE: (Dejected.) "Oh... oh all right. I can tell when I'm not wanted."

Soon as Milhouse is gone, Bart runs back to the shack where he finds Groundskeeper Willie enjoying a can of Buzz Cola, completely unaware of Jenny and the 4Kids TMNT hiding in the shadow of his own shack.

WILLIE: "Ach, what're you doing here, ya wee one?"
BART: "Um, I think I... left a baseball bat lying around here."
WILLIE: "Oh yea? I find a lot of those around here. Can ya be more specific?"

4Kids Donatello tosses his bo staff, which lands right next to Bart.

BART: "Oh, here it is! Boy, what a relief!"
WILLIE: "A little on the skinny side for a bat, and what's with the purple bandaging wrapped around the middle?"
BART: "Oh, did I say I was looking for a baseball bat? No, it's a pogo stick."

4Kids Leonardo runs up behind Groundskeeper Willie and taps him on a pressure point on his neck, which causes him to go unconscious. 4Kids Michelangelo and Raphael place Willie carefully onto a chair inside the shack.

4KIDS LEO: "I gotta tell you, kid, you just suck at fibbing!"
BART: (Handing 4Kids Donatello back his bo.) "Well, I wouldn't have had to if this one had given me something that actually looked like a baseball bat!"
4KIDS DON: "Well, I figured it'd be far more believable than Mikey's nunchucks!"
4KIDS MIKEY: "Hey guys, there's a box in here full of old used tuxedos."
4KIDS RAPH: "Yea, and they're all different colors, just like the ones we wore to that O'Neil Tech gala in 2105!"
4KIDS DON: "Great, it'll make blending in a lot easier!"




About 30 minutes later, Bart is guiding Jenny and the 4Kids TMNT through Springfield.

JENNY: "Well, as long as nobody notices your hands and faces, we should be okay."
4KIDS DON: "Too bad we couldn't have come across a set of color coded hoodies."
4KIDS MIKEY: (Laughs.) "Oh yea, nothing sets off peoples' creep-alarms like four guys wearing color coded hoodies."
4KIDS LEO: "Where are you leading us to, Bart?"
BART: "I thought I'd take you to see Professor Frink. He probably knows all about inter-dimensional travel and whatnot!"
4KIDS RAPH: "Just so long as he doesn't attempt to dissect us or anything!"
4KIDS LEO: "Guys, hold up. I thought I heard police sirens."
4KIDS RAPH: "Oh no, we are not playing vigilante to these yellow skinned, four fingered weirdos!"

Bart notices Apu Nahasapeemapetilon running up the street trying to buckle his belt.

APU: "Help! Somebody, please help me!!!"
BART: "Apu, what's going on?"
APU: (Short of breath) "Hoodlums, Bart. Hoodlums showed up while I was using the restroom and they set the Kwik-E-Mart on fire!"
4KIDS MIKEY: "Are there people in danger?"
APU: "Who gives a shit about that?! My damn store is ablaze!!!"

Apu runs back towards the convenience store, just as a fire truck whizzes by in the same direction.

4KIDS DON: "Think we should get involved?"
4KIDS RAPH: "Oh no, we ain't blowing our cover just to put out a fire!"
4KIDS LEO: "Besides, it looks like the fire's being taken out pretty easily anyway."
BART: "Oh yea, these kind of things happen there all the time. Funny though, I don't see much of Apu or his family these days."
4KIDS LEO: "Come on, the sun's beginning to set. Lets go find this Professor Frink before we run into anymore wild shenanigans."
4KIDS RAPH: "Why can't those stupid goofball Ninja Turtles just get here in their clown car already?!"
4KIDS MIKEY: "What is your beef with them, bro?"
JENNY: "I dunno, if I met someone who was like a weird copy of me, I'd probably be a little freaked out too!"
4KIDS RAPH: "See? She gets it."

Another 15 minutes later, the group arrives at the home of Professor Jonathan Frink.

FRINK: "Ah, young Mr. Simpson. What brings you here at this hour?"
BART: "We seem to have some unexpected company... from another dimension."
FRINK: "Fascinating. Come in then."

As Jenny and the 4Kids TMNT enter, Frink is overcome with astonishment.

FRINK: "Good Glayvin, four giant frogs dressed like the guys in Dumb and Dumber!"
4KIDS DON: "We're turtles, not frogs."

The 4Kids TMNT proceed to remove their disguises.

FRINK: "This is uh... this is outstanding! Alien turtles from another dimension?"
4KIDS MIKEY: "We're mutants from another Earth."
FRINK: "And what of this girl here, is she from your Earth as well?"
JENNY: "No, I'm from a different Earth where all of you are basically animated cartoon characters."
4KIDS MIKEY: "Our counterparts from her dimension were passing though ours and an enemy of ours from the future showed up and things went a little haywire with my brother Don's dimensional portal."
FRINK: "I see. Well lets take a look at you four with my quantum energy detector. Perhaps there's still some chronal energy in your cellular matrix, which can be traced back to the source."
4KIDS RAPH: "Uh, try it on Mikey first. He's like the resident guinea pig of our group!"
4KIDS MIKEY: "Oh ha ha!"


Professor Frink leads 4Kids Michelangelo to what looks like an operating table and proceeds to scan him with a bright blue beam. Just then, the Dimension J TMNT show up crashing through a skylight.

DONATELLO, LEONARDO, MICHAELANGELO + RAPHAEL: "Turtle power!!!"
4KIDS RAPH: "Yea, now they get here."
FRINK: "Oh, I just had that window replaced, glayvin!"
RAPHAEL: (Grabs Professor Frink by the collar) "Okay, you mad scientist. Let our counterparts go or... wait a minute. Aren't you the Nutty Professor?"
MICHAELANGELO: "Yea, and that kid over there looks like Bart Simpson."
JENNY: "That is Bart Simpson, guys. We're in Springfield!"
DONATELLO: "We really should've checked out the place first before jumping to conclusions like that."
LEONARDO: "Sorry about the mess. We thought you were some evil mad scientist trying to hurt our-"
FRINK: "It's all right, my green skinned chums. I've been mistaken for an evil mad scientist before."
4KIDS RAPH: "What took you guys so long to find us?!"
RAPHAEL: "Hey, the four of us were stuck in some dimensional rift for about two whole hours until Jeff, Patrick and Jenny were able to find us, and we managed to find you in like half that time!"
DONATELLO: "Mortu was a big help tracking the exit point of the warp Viral sent you through."
JENNY: "So where to next?"
LEONARDO: "Jeff and Patrick are back in the Turtle Van using the Dimension Hopper to figure that out."
4KIDS LEO: "Well, what are we waiting for? Lets get the shell out of here!"

Jenny, Bart and the Turtles run out through the back of Professor Frink's lab, running right passed Barney Gumble and Otto the bus driver.

BARNEY: "Whoa, did you see that?"
OTTO: "Yea, man! I gotta lay off the midnight bong hits!"
BARNEY: "You should come with me to the next AA meeting."
OTTO: "Oh yea, where's that gonna be at?"
BARNEY: "Moe's hosting it at the bar."
OTTO: "Cool, we can get buzzed right afterwards!"

Back at Springfield Elementary, Jeff and Patrick are patiently waiting in the Turtle Van for their friends to return.

PATRICK: "Think we should go look for them?"
JEFF: "We can't. The Dimension Hopper is still picking up data from the warp. We should get a fix on who's been making these dimensional rifts very soon, and it looks like we were right on the money about suspecting The Kraang. Check that out!"
PATRICK: "Dimension X?"
JEFF: "Yep. Looks like we're going to be paying the Nickelodeon TMNT a visit after all... soon as the guys get back with Jenny and the 2003 Turtles."
PATRICK: "Hey there they are... and Bart Simpson's with them!"
JEFF: "Man, now I wish we had time to meet Homer and the rest of the family." (Sighs.) "Oh well, this was a fun little pit stop."

Jeff opens the back door to let the Turtles and Jenny pile into the van.

BART: (Waves to everyone.) "Later, dudes!"

Homer Simpson shows up just as the Turtle Van pulls off.

HOMER: "Where've you been, son? We've gotta make it to Krusty Burger before they run out of Krusty-Partially-Gelatinated-Non-Dairy-Gum-Based-Beverages!"
BART: "Oh man, I almost forgot! Lisa's at the library."
HOMER: "We know. She called us figuring you'd forget. Now come on, I'm starving!!!"
BART: (Chuckles.) "Thanks for the news flash, tubbo!"
HOMER: (Playfully tussles Bart's hair.) "Smart-ass."


CONTINUE TO PART CINCO

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